Kim Possible, Ron Stoppable, Rufus, Felix Renton, Monique, Wade, Drakken, Shego, Lars and Hank Perkins are characters from the Kim Possible show, created by Mark McCorkle and Bob Schooley, owned and copyright © by the Walt Disney Company. The story takes place while Kim and Ron are going to college, a couple of years after “So the Drama,” and shortly after my earlier story, “Ninjas on the River.” This story © 2005 by cloudmonet.
Shego sat on a chair that had seen better days, watching the morning sun through a curtain of falling water. She wore a green peasant blouse with black embroidery and loose black stretch pants. Her hands rested on her swollen belly. She got up and walked to the cave entrance, peering to one side of the water at the thick jungle below, and up at the pale blue sky with patches of white clouds. She sighed and walked to the back of the cave, bent down to lift up the sliding door, and walked through tunnels and opened doors to walk into the back rooms she shared with her husband, Drakken.
“I would have opened that door for you,” he said. He was sitting on the couch, wearing brown shorts, sandals, and a “Stop the Logging” T-shirt.
Shego sat beside him, saying, “I’ve been thinking, about Greensleeves and what we should do.”
“You’re making the plans now?”
“I’m not your sidekick any more. I’m your wife. Why? Do you have a plan?”
“Well— I got nothing,” Drakken admitted.
“It was fun helping the Indians save the rain forest,” Shego said, sounding almost perky. “We actually won! The loggers called it quits. The Indian blowguns delivering robot ticks with laser cutters, the perfect sabotage. And when the loggers came after the village, they weren’t expecting Indians trained in kung fu!”
“It’s over now,” Drakken said glumly.
“Natty wants us to join Greensleeves,” said Shego. “If you let Dr. Ruiz give you that skin treatment, we could.”
“I’ve considered it,” said Drakken.
Shego gently touched his face. “I love your blue skin, your scar, your wild black hair, the shadows, the night, the evil, it just makes me wild for you— but I keep thinking about the 167 years in prison waiting for us. We’re trapped here, and too many people I don’t trust know where we are—”
“Kim Possible,” said Drakken.
“I actually trust her more than Lars or Hank Perkins,” said Shego. “I think if we don’t do anything she considers evil, she’ll let us be.”
“You think Kim Possible was telling the truth about Lars working for Hank?”
“Doy! Hank has control of everything. If it suits him, he’ll turn us in. But if you looked different, we could join Greensleeves, we could fight whaling ships. We’ll be pirates, and Possible, if she ever finds out, will approve! These people don’t care who we used to be. This is our ticket to new life and new adventure.”
“My treat,” said Monique, getting into the driver’s seat of her big green Buick. Kim opened the passenger door, flipped the seat forward to let her fiancé, Ron Stoppable, into the back, and got in front beside Monique. Rufus, Ron’s pet naked mole rat, sat on top of his head.
“This is a nice car,” said Kim.
“It’s so not what I really want, but it’s a ride,” Monique said. “It’s what I can afford. Someday, though, I’m gonna give you a ride in my Mercedes, or my Corvette.” She started the motor, backed out of the parking place, drove to the gate, stuck her student ID card in the slot, and turned onto the street. Raindrops gathered on the windshield. Monique turned on the wipers, lights, and heater. “So how’d your sociology reports go over?”
“I got an A minus,” Ron said proudly.
“And I just got a B,” said Kim.
“Ron out-scored you? Since when does that happen?”
“He wrote a good report,” said Kim.
“Where are we going?” asked Ron.
“With you along, where else? The Bueno Nacho on the corner of Pine and 15th,” said Monique.
“Hurray!” said Rufus.
Wearing a lime-green maternity dress and carrying a small black purse, Shego walked into a beauty salon in Lima, Peru. “Buenos dios, señora,” said a perky young hairdresser.
“Do you hablo Anglais?” Shego asked, pointing at herself. “I’m Americana, turista.”
“Oh sure, okay,” she replied. “I’m Maria. How may I help you?”
Shego pulled a credit card out of her purse and looked at the name, Sarah Lynn Jones, while asking, “Do you take this?”
“Oh sure, Señora Jones,” Maria said smiling.
“I want to get my hair cut,” Shego said, pointing to her shoulders. “Right about here, shoulder length, and maybe change the style, too.”
“Would you like to look at the book, Señora Jones?” asked Maria, handing Shego a looseleaf binder filled with photographs.
“You can call me Sarah,” Shego said. “You know, Maria, I think I like your hair better than any of these pictures— simple, but kinda pretty.”
“You are too kind, Señora Sarah,” Maria said, gesturing toward the chair. Shego sat down and Maria put the cloth around her neck, sliding it under the thick cascade of rippling black hair.
Kim slid into the booth with a plate of rice and salad. Ron sat next to her with a grandé-sized naco, which Rufus began nibbling. Monique sat facing them, with double chimmeritos. All three had large sodas with bendy straws.
“I got boy trouble,” Monique said abruptly.
“Okay, who is he?” asked Kim.
“Nobody,” said Monique. “That’s my trouble. What keeps going down is ’bout the time I realize I like a guy, some other woman’s moving on him, but when I do just go for it— oh no, then he’s a bad boy, and I so regret it.”
“Murphy’s law applied to romance,” said Kim.
“Whatever can go wrong will go wrong,” said Monique.
“Kim, that thing you said your mom told you about the eyes,” Ron said. “How’d it go?”
“Oh right,” said Kim. “He can’t keep his eyes off you, his eyes get big and round, and he can’t help smiling. That’s the boy you want.”
“Well, okay,” said Monique.
Belinda Brockmeyer pushed open the front door and held it while Felix Renton rolled through in his wheelchair. Felix saw Kim and Ron and waved. Monique turned to see who they were waving at.
“Just who I do not want to see right now,” Monique said in a low voice.
“Can’t handle Belinda’s karmic implications?” Ron asked quietly. “She drives me crazy, too.”
“You mean you like Felix?” whispered Kim, and Monique covered her face with her hands.
“I didn’t know he could,” she said softly, wiping tears from her eyes. “I feel so selfish. I should be happy for him.”
“Let me move over,” Kim told Ron, who got up so she could slide into the booth beside Monique and put her arm around her.
“Hey guys, what’s happening?” asked Felix, rolling over toward their booth with his tray on his lap, Belinda following with hers.
“Maybe this isn’t a real good time,” said Ron.
Monique forced a smile. “I’m fine,” she said.
Belinda sat next to Ron, who rearranged the trays of food. She looked into Monique’s eyes for a long moment.
“You know, sister, you really creep me out when you do that,” Monique said harshly.
Belinda shrugged and mumbled, “—sorry.”
“Monique, please,” Felix said, touching Belinda’s hand. “She’s very sensitive. She doesn’t mean any harm.”
“I’m sorry,” Monique said, trying to make her voice less harsh but not quite succeeding. “Sometimes I just blurt out what’s real for me without thinking.”
“That’s what’s beautiful about you,” said Belinda.
Monique looked at Belinda, then at Kim. “I’m gonna break down,” she mumbled.
“Um, Belinda, Felix,” said Kim, looking at them both. “Monique’s going through some stuff and she wanted to talk to just me and Ron, you know.”
“That’s cool,” said Felix. “Let’s go sit over there.”
“Oh, okay,” said Belinda. “If there’s anything I can do to help—”
Felix backed his wheelchair away from the table and moved across the dining room, followed by Belinda.
“She’s too nice to all of us,” Monique said quietly. “I’m totally jeal, all right? But she’s so nice, it makes me feel bad about jealing. It’s not just about Felix. My luck with men has been nothing but ‘lady sings the blues.’ Don’t even get me started about Wendell. I swear, he can fake the look, you know, that look o’ love thing you and Ron were saying? Don’t mean nothing on Wendell’s face.”
Shego walked up the front steps to Lima Hospital. She took out her compact and looked in the mirror, hardly recognizing herself. Her skin was pale, but not noticeably greenish. Her black hair framed her face with tousled curls. Her lips were decidedly pink. “Euggh!” she said. “I look like a grown up version of the girls I hated in high school.” But then she smiled. “I wonder if Dr. Ruiz will recognize me.” She put her compact away and walked into the lobby.
“I’m here to see Dr. Ruiz,” she told the receptionist.
“And you are—”
“But your name, señora. To find your chart—”
“I have an unlisted chart,” Shego said.
“Oh, you’re one of those patients. Okay.” She summoned Dr. Ruiz over the intercom in Spanish.
Dr. Ruiz walked into the waiting room and looked at Shego. “Have I seen you before?” she began asking, but then guessed, “Sheila?”
“How’s my husband?”
Dr. Ruiz smiled, “Looking rather handsome. Come this way.” She led Shego through a network of corridors to an elevator, down into the sub-basement, and into a laboratory. “You see, I also have my lair,” Dr. Ruiz quipped. Inside was a tank of liquid, with breathing tubes and a cushioned bottom. Drakken wasn’t in this, however, but getting up from a tanning bed and wrapping a towel around his middle. His skin was a healthy looking tan, and the scar under his left eye, while still visible, was much less conspicuous.
“Wow,” said Shego, feeling the muscles on his shoulder. “You look— pretty good, actually.”
Drakken looked startled. “Shego, you curled your hair, and cut it, and your face looks different somehow.”
“It’s her lipstick,” said Dr. Ruiz. “She usually wears really dark. You go get dressed, and I’ll give Sheila her prenatal, okay?”
High above the cloud layers over the Pacific Ocean, a small black jet with “KP” monogrammed on the tail fin flew southwest toward Australia. Kim sat at the controls, looking at the instruments, occasionally moving something slightly.
“So you’re taking me along instead of Felix just to make me feel better?” asked Monique. “That’s nice of you, but I can’t fly a jet or fight kung fu. I’m not much use.”
“Think of it more like a vacation,” said Kim. “Sandy beaches, coral reefs, warm water—”
“Sounds good to me. So we’re flying halfway around the world for Thanksgiving break?” Monique asked.
“I’ve got a job,” said Kim, “which gives me a good excuse not to go back to Middleton.”
“What’s the job?” asked Monique.
“Helping Crocodile Jack put satellite cams on endangered sea turtles.”
“Crocodile Jack!” exclaimed Monique. “We gonna be on his TV show?”
“Maybe,” said Kim. “He films everything he does. He’s been wanting me to work with him for years, but I never had time.”
“Why didn’t you tell me being a hero comes with perks?” Monique asked Ron, poking him in the side with her elbow. “He won’t make us jump on a crocodile, will he?”
“Nah,” said Ron, “this is a sea turtle episode.”
Soon after dark, a green sports utility vehicle wound around the back roads toward a private airstrip. The driver was a shaggy bearded man named Scruff. In the passenger seat was Natty, a heavy-set woman with blonde dreadlocks. In the back seat sat Shego and Drakken, dressed, like their companions, in camouflage T-shirts and shorts.
“So what do we call you from now on?” Natty asked.
“I’m Sheila, he’s Drake,” said Shego.
“Like Sir Francis, the pirate,” Drakken said.
“That sounds cool,” said Scruff.
“Sheila and Drake, you got it,” said Natty.
Sheila sighed. “Where are we going, anyway?”
“We got a hot tip about an illegal Japanese whaler going to intercept the migration,” said Scruff. “We got a ship docked in Australia that needs a fresh crew. That’s us!”
“Well, technically the whaler might not be illegal, since Japan didn’t sign the treaty, but they should,” said Natty.
Scruff parked the green vehicle near a green jet at one end of the runway. They all got out and climbed up the stairs into the jet.
“Not a bad plane,” Sheila remarked. “I’ve flown worse.”
“You’re a pilot?” asked Tuff, who was sitting at the controls. “Sweet! You want to do the honors?”
Sheila smiled. “I love to fly.”
Tuff got up. Sheila slipped into the pilot’s chair and very professionally began flipping controls.
“Score! She’s a pro,” Tuff told Scruff and Natty.
“Of course she is,” said Drake.
“Everybody buckled up?” Sheila asked.
The engines started. The jet quickly accelerated, rose off the runway, and climbed into the starry sky.
Kim landed her jet at a private airstrip near Bugaboo, Australia. A tall woman with long brown hair in khaki shirt and shorts got out of a massive white sports utility vehicle and waved.
“I’m Kim Possible,” she said, “and this is my fiancé, Ron Stoppable, and our friend, Monique, who I gather is a big fan of your show.”
“Crocodile Kate!” said Monique. “I can’t believe I’m really talking to you!”
“Well, you are,” Kate smiled. “Jack’s waiting for us at the harbor. We’re in kind of a hurry, something extra’s come up.”
“Oh?” asked Kim, getting beside Kate in the front seat while Ron and Monique sat in the back with an old black labrador, who aimed her head at Ron’s pocket and started sniffing.
“Is this Sally?” asked Monique, patting the dog’s head. “I think she smells Rufus.”
Ron reached into his pocket and pulled him out. Rufus blinked, saw the dog, and panicked, climbing on top of Ron’s head. “She’s just a dog, Rufus. Friendly dog? Friendly dog.”
“Okay,” Rufus said.
Kate drove quickly through town to the marina on the bay, where Crocodile Jack was waiting with the boat. Kim, Ron, Monique, Kate, and Jack had to introduce themselves several times before the director and both cameramen were satisfied.
“Okay, this mission’s become a bit more complicated,” said Jack. “There’s a Japanese whaling ship closing in on the migration route, and a Greensleeves crew going out to intercept them. So, in addition to the turtle cams, we’ll be meeting up with the Greensleeves boat and giving them a bit of tucker, fuel, and other supplies.”
“On the second morning of our voyage,” Kate narrated, “We stopped at the Great Barrier Reef so our friends from America could explore the beauty of the coral formations and the reef fishes.”
The cameraman followed Kim and Monique, wearing blue and green bikinis, snorkeling in the clear shallow water with the colorful reef fishes.
“While I caught a striped sea snake and showed it to Ron,” Jack narrated, with a heavy Australian accent. “He got a little nervous when I told him about the venom. No worries, mate. They’re very placid and never bite.”
“Aaaauuuggh!” said Ron, making a cartoonish face of fright while the snake flowed from his arms through Jack’s and back into the water.
“Rufus came out of Ron’s pocket when Ron put him in his little diving ball,” Kate narrated. “The little mole rat was quite adept at propelling himself through the water by running inside the ball like a hamster, but I don’t know how this works.”
“Ron told us that he’s done a lot of diving with Kim and Rufus while sneaking up on villains’ island lairs,” Jack narrated. “Next, we’ll see how they do at catching turtles. After we meet the folks from Greensleeves, that is.”
Aboard a green and white boat speeding through the warm turquoise waters, Natty was inside the cabin running down the plan with Scruff, Drake, and Sheila. Pointing to the chart, she said, “This is where we touch base with Crocodile Jack. He’ll be giving us food, fuel, supplies.”
“Any weapons?” asked Drake. “With a good laser cannon we could vaporize our foe’s harpoon guns.”
“Interesting idea, but not our style,” said Scruff. “We are the weapon. Our boat is the shield between whaler and whale.”
“She’s a sturdy boat, but not armored,” said Sheila. “Are we depending on their honor not to hurt us? How long can this passive stuff work before the whalers wise up and send a boarding party of ninjas or something?”
Natty laughed. “Ninjas?”
“They are Japanese whalers after all,” said Drake.
“He’s got a point,” said Scruff. “What if they do have ninjas?”
“Usually, I could handle any ninjas,” said Sheila. “But I’m kinda pregnant and my baby doesn’t much like kung fu.”
“You could train us like you trained the native South Americans,” said Scruff.
“They were warriors,” said Sheila. “You guys are peace protesters. It’s gonna take more work.”
“You know real martial arts?” asked Natty. “Black belt?”
“World class,” Drake said proudly.
“At my best, I’ve only met one fighter who outclassed me, but I’m not at my best.”
“We do have satellite phones,” said Natty. “We can call backup. We’ve done this before. No worries.”
Crocodile Jack’s white boat and Greensleeves’ green and white one were tied to each other in the shallow water. Kim and Ron passed each crate to Kate and Monique, who handed it over the rails to Scruff and Tuff, then to Drake and Sheila, while the cameramen filmed.
“Is that her?” Sheila asked quietly.
Drake turned his head to look on the other boat. “Can’t tell. Probably just someone who looks like her.”
Natty was talking to Jack about the Greensleeves mission.
“There used to be huge schools of copperbottom whales off the Australian Coast every spring,” Natty said. “They were nearly wiped out by whaling ships in the twentieth century. They’re such big, beautiful, sensitive animals. They have no idea why our species would want to harm them. I touched a copperbottom’s flipper once. It was such an honor.”
“I’d just like to put out the word to all of Crocodile Jack’s friends in Japan,” he said. “Write your government. Japan should sign the whaling ban treaty. There’s no reason to kill whales, especially copperbottoms.”
“That’s a wrap,” said the director.
“I know you,” Kim said. “You’re Natty, right? I called you in on the Peruvian logging protest.”
“Kim Possible!” Natty exclaimed, hugging her. “I kinda thought that was you, sister.”
“Okay, hold that thought a moment,” said Jack. “This sounds interesting. You rolling?”
“We got it,” said one of the cameramen.
“So how’d it go?”
“Spiffy!” said Natty. “The native South Americans totally saved that rain forest, and now we’re here to save the whales.”
Suddenly Kim’s eyes got big and her jaw dropped. “Oh my gosh! Are you— Cut the cameras immediately, okay? Okay? I want to see you put them down.”
“Should we?” asked one of the cameramen.
“What’s up?” asked Jack.
Kim climbed over the rails onto the Greensleeves boat and walked up to the pregnant woman with shoulder length curly hair. “She— Sheila?” she asked.
“Yeah, it’s me,” she mumbled. “Thanks for killing the cameras.”
“Your friends joined us,” said Scruff. “Quite a score! They’re both rather talented.”
“Yes, they are,” Kim agreed. “But I don’t see—”
“Drake?” asked Sheila, pointing to the shirtless man.
“Wow,” said Kim. “You fixed your skin somehow?”
“I’m not the man you knew,” he said. “I’m Drake, and I’m here to save the whales.”
“Spanking!” Kim said, and winked at him. “Ron and I are here to save the turtles.”
“Okay,” said Crocodile Jack. “Can we roll again? Kim, can you do your spanking save the turtles line again? We can use that.”
“Okay— Spanking! Ron and I are here to save the turtles.”
“Okay, let’s untie the boats and start the motors,” said Jack.
Down in the hold, Drake was using his nanomanipulator to fiddle with the laser and semiconductor chips from a broken CD player. A pair of binoculars lay on the bench, altered so the objective lenses and eyepieces pointed in opposite directions.
Sheila climbed down the ladder. “You really ought to come up and see this. We found the pod!”
“The whales?” asked Drake, raising his head. The boat suddenly rocked back and forth, but most of his stuff was clamped to the bench except the altered binoculars, which he grabbed.
Drake followed Sheila up the ladder to the deck.
“Aren’t they beautiful?” asked Natty.
All Drake could see was moving dark lumps in the waves. Suddenly one of them curved down and the tail flukes came out of the ocean and struck the water hard, rocking the boat again.
“Ship on radar!” said Scruff. “Moving to intercept the pod.”
“Too soon! I’m not ready!” said Drake.
“Ready or not, here they come,” said Tuff. “Setting course for interception.”
“Later that afternoon,” Crocodile Kate narrated, “we stopped at Little Mangrove Island, where Kim used her special grappling hook gun to swing onto a high branch and catch a Grayson’s tree boa that Jack was climbing after. A high tech Tarzan, this girl.”
“Have a look at this little beauty,” said Kim, holding the snake for the camera.
“That’s my line,” said Jack.
“Make sure the snake’s not poisonous,” said Ron. “Jack has a weird sense of humor.”
“That Ron! Course, I wouldn’t let them muck with a venomous snake that might actually bite,” Jack narrated.
“The Grayson’s tree boa is found only on the Mangrove Islands group,” Kate added.
“After that, Kim and Ron gave us a demonstration of kung fu fighting on the beach,” Jack narrated. “They’re both right near as fast as lunging crocs, these two. I wouldn’t want to be on the receiving end of these blows, but so far they’re totally dodging each other. Oooh, not quite! That’s got to hurt!”
“No kidding,” said Ron, flipped on his back and panting for breath. Kim jumped on top of him, pinning his shoulders and legs with her hands and knees. Unexpectedly, Ron twisted over and managed to rise partway, but Kim made him lose balance and pinned him again.
“Let’s trade positions,” Kim said. “I’ll show you how you should’ve done that.”
The whaling ship, The Grim Butcher, was bearing down on the much smaller Greensleeves boat, but came to a stop just short of ramming her. The captain came to the front rail and bowed. “I am so sorry,” he shouted, “but I cannot allow you to stand between me and my whales.”
“We’re not sorry to be here to save the whales!” cried Natty.
Suddenly six fine chains with grappling hooks flew high over the rails and through the air to land on the Greensleeves boat deck and clamp hard on the rails. Tuff grabbed a machete and tried to cut the chains.
Sheila grabbed at a chain with her bare hands, which suddenly glowed with green flames which melted the chain. She put out the fire in her hands and clutched her belly. “She kicks something awful every time I do that,” Sheila complained.
In the blinding light of mirrors reflecting the sun, black hooded ninjas used short lengths of rope to slide down the chains from the whaling ship, which was now much closer. Sheila managed to flip one ninja overboard. The others had already subdued Tuff, Scruff, and Natty.
Drake shut himself in the cabin and tried to use the satellite phone.
“G’day, mate,” said Crocodile Jack’s voice.
“Greensleeves here,” said Drake. “We’re being attacked by ninjas. We need Kim Possible.”
“This is so humiliating,” said Sheila, barely managing to keep the ninjas at bay with her kicks. One of them flew through the air and tackled her to the deck.
“What are you doing to my wife?” snarled Drake, ripping open the cabin door and running at the ninjas.
Monique and Kim, floating in the clear water, each clung to the side of the small boat with one arm and pushed at the sea turtle’s leathery carapace with the other arm while Jack and Kate got their arms under the front flippers and pulled.
“She’s a beauty,” said Jack.
“We have to weigh her, and then glue the small satellite video cam to the back of her shell,” Kate narrated. “The video will be streamed to a satellite and back to our recorder on the boat. The little cam will cause the turtle no harm, but provide us unique information about what sea turtles actually do. Should be interesting.”
What was edited out of the show, or never filmed, was the satellite phone call to Crocodile Jack, and Kim’s reaction.
“The ultimate irony finally happens,” said Ron. “We’re going to save Drakken and Shego.”
“I just wish we knew how many ninjas there are,” said Kim. “Besides that, we have a whole crew of whalers, maybe. I hope this doesn’t hurt my reputation. I know we’re doing the right thing, but some of the authorities I work with won’t see it that way.”
In the hold, they changed into their mission clothes. On deck, Ron had the camera crew and Jack prying open a large crate. Inside was the folded-up stealth bike.
“A motor scooter?” asked Jack, as Ron pressed the yellow button which unfolded it.
“Amphibious,” said Ron, flipping the hidden switch that turned it into a jet ski.
Kim and Ron lowered the jet ski onto the water and climbed aboard. Kim started the motor, and the jet ski accelerated, faster and faster, just skimming the waves, and finally almost flying.
They found the Greensleeves boat adrift, with no one aboard. Kim went into the cabin and started the engine.
“But the stealth bike’s so much faster,” said Ron.
“You want to try blocking exploding harpoons with the stealth bike?” asked Kim.
“Point well taken.”
Kim pulled off her black turtleneck and put on a camouflage T-shirt. “Let’s be Greensleeves,” she said, trading her cargo pants for camo shorts.
“Okay,” said Ron, changing his own clothes.
They hauled the jetski aboard, and Kim pulled out the kimmunicator.
“Wade, you got any live satellite views of a Japanese whaling ship and a pod of copperbottom whales?” she asked.
“So you’re working for Greensleeves now?” he asked.
“They got kidnapped,” said Kim.
“Okay, here’s your course and speed for interception.”
Ron and Rufus searched the hold to look for useful gear. The naked mole rat immediately spotted Drakken’s half-finished laser and hopped on the bench, chattering eagerly.
“What’s this?” asked Ron, looking at the pieces. “Looks like someone was trying to build something.”
Rufus sniffed. “Drakken!” he said, and picked up some tools and began working on the gizmo, as if he knew exactly what it was and how to complete it.
Kim, wearing a captain’s hat, steered the Greensleeves boat toward The Grim Butcher, coming between the whaler and the copperbottoms.
“Why don’t the whales just dive deep?” asked Ron. “They really don’t understand what’s happening!”
Rufus was chattering to him eagerly, holding the altered binoculars.
The first harpoon flew through the air and missed.
Ron looked at the strange device, trying to figure it out. On one side the objective lens was blocked by a black cap with a red button. Ron picked it up and looked with one eye through the other side and saw cross-hairs. “Aha!” he said, and centered the harpoon gun in the cross hairs and pressed the button. A fine needle of intense red light shot out the eyepiece of the other side of the altered binoculars through hundreds of feet of air to the harpoon gun, cutting the mechanism neatly in half. “Badical!” Ron exclaimed.
“What’s badical?” Kim asked, looking at Ron, then back at The Grim Butcher, where fragments of harpoon gun were falling into the sea. “Did you do that, with that?” she asked Ron. “Can you get the other one?”
Ron looked through the scope. “As soon as this guy moves out of the way— now!” The hairline laser sliced the other harpoon gun in half, triggering a small explosion.
“Careful, Ron,” said Kim.
A group of grappling hooks with fine chains came flying through the air to grab the rails of the Greensleeves boat. Six ninjas clasping short lengths of rope began sliding down the chains.
“Ninjas can swim, can’t they?” Kim said. “Cut both ends.”
“Done and done,” said Ron, slicing the distant ends with the red hairline first, which made the ninjas splash into the water, then slicing the near ends attached to the grappling hooks on the Greensleeves boat’s rail.
“That’s a lot easier than roughing them up, don’t you think?” said Kim. “Ahoy there, Captain Grim Butcher-san!” she cried out. “I have two demands! Give me back my crew, and go back to Japan.”
The captain leaned on the rails, shaking his fist. “They’re going back to Japan to stand trial for piracy!” he shouted.
Ron neatly sliced the rails on either side of the captain, making him plummet into the water. Someone threw him a life preserver on a rope, but Ron cut the rope.
“Anyone more reasonable care to negotiate?” shouted Kim.
At this point, with some of the crew in the water in boats going after the floating ninjas, Shego was able to break free. Gritting her teeth against the pain, she threw balls of green flame at the crew members holding Drakken, Natty, Scruff, and Tuff, and all five scrambled over the side into a boat. Shego burned the lines and it fell to the water. Tuff started the outboard and the boat churned through the water toward the Greensleeves boat.
“You’re turning green,” said Natty.
“I feel sick,” said Shego, clutching her belly. “Please, baby, calm down. Mommy had to do it. Mommy had to get away.”
“What did you do, Sheila?” Scruff asked.
“It’s, uh, really advanced martial arts my wife knows,” said Drakken. “It’s called ‘flaming hands.’ Very few people know how to do it.”
“Far out,” Scruff replied.
From the Greensleeves boat, Ron watched The Grim Butcher turn away. Everyone else was gathered around Sheila, trying to make her feel more comfortable.
“You guys are gonna have to rethink your tactics,” Kim told Natty. “Ron and I upped the ante with Drake’s weapon. What if the next whaling crew have their own laser?”
“They upped the ante first with the ninjas,” said Scruff.
“You’re gonna have to allow for ninjas in your rules of engagement,” said Kim. “And also for weapons.”
“Do we want to go there?” asked Natty. “Do we want to fight whaling ships with our own battleship? That’s not what I think Greensleeves should be all about.”
“What are your rules?” Tuff asked Kim.
“I don’t fight if I don’t believe in the cause. No one ever gets killed or maimed. I don’t use any more force than I have to use to win.”
“Sounds righteous to me.”
“But consider what this might mean for those whalers. If they pressed their attack, and if it was harsh enough, I might have sank their ship and left the whole crew bruised and beaten on a small island with one satellite phone to call for help. I try not to be like that, but sometimes—”
“Now you sound harsh,” said Natty.
“I said I only met one fighter who outclassed me at my best,” said Sheila. “There she is, Kim Possible.”
“What?” said Kim, looking at Sheila’s face.
“It’s just the truth, and we both know it,” she replied.